Your Fortress of Solitude isn’t always inviolate. There’ll be times when family, friends, or colleagues come over and you may not want them to gaze upon your prized vibrator. Happily, you’ve got plenty of great locations for concealment, including ones that may never have occurred to you.
Normally, storing your vibrator in a discrete location in your bedroom is a perfectly sound solution, especially if yours is not a discreet vibrator. Only churls and the terminally obnoxious would enter your bedroom and rummage through your dresser and closet. Unfortunately, most of us know our fair share of obnoxious churls, so it’s good to have some more discrete locations on tap for hiding your vibrator.
Remember to wrap a cloth around your vibrating toy and store it in a dark, dry place to protect its material. If you have a small safe for keeping your passport and other important papers in, you’re golden. Barring that, throw pillows can make excellent hiding places. Just unzip your comfy Elmo pillow and slip your vibrator into the stuffing. Note that this isn’t so brilliant if your guests might be inclined to grab Elmo and recline on him.
If you’re reasonably skilled with tools, why not go the 007 route? A piece of plywood, some magnetic stripping, and a set of small magnets are everything you need to create a false bottom. Cut the plywood to the drawer’s dimensions, affix the stripping to the pre-existing wood, glue the magnets to the corners of the false bottom, and presto! You’re the second coming of Mata Hari.
You shouldn’t have to hide your vibrator, but some folks have no respect for the notion of privacy. The good news is that with just a smidgeon of ingenuity, you’ll have a hidey-hole that will keep your vibrator safe from prying eyes no matter how nosy they are.
